Oh Boy, How I Wish you were a Man

Although there is no Mr. X in my life anymore, I figured there needed to be a man post today, if only to up the percentage of dateable men in Vancouver for my enjoyment.  This of course is a personal opinion and not meant to offend any guys out there, think of it merely as a lesson in getting more girls!  I'm going to tell you all a little story, it happened many years ago, and although many could view it as insignificant, it would alter how I approached all my future relationships.  

So I was dating a boy and at the time we were planning on going on a trip, somewhere hot, I suggested we meet with a travel agent to figure out the best places to go.  The next morning I wake up, put on grey floaty little tunic, legging and black ballet flats layer on some jewelry and scarf and warm coat (I have photographic memory when it comes to previously worn outfits.)  Hop in my car to go pick the boyfriend up for the travel agent appointment.  I pull up to his house, text him and then watch in horror as he walks down his driveway in an outfit that is now burned in my memory.  Grey hoodie (with ketchup stain on the front,) matching grey sweatpants (also with grease stains on them) and dirty running shoes.  

Now, I was normally very nice, never judgmental or outspoken (most of the time) but this..THIS OUTFIT...I had to ask: "umm are you kidding me right now?"  Turns out he wasn't and he believed this was perfectly acceptable look to be seen in.  Needless to say, I refused to turn my car on, nor go anywhere till he changed.  Some may call this superficial and bitchy, but frankly I don't give a damn, how is society suppose to function if people think it's okay to dress like slobs.  I will not be a part of furthering the slovenly, stretchy pants, Lululemon existence Vancouverites have gotten themselves into.   Of course, the Ashley of today would of dumped his sloppy ass right then and there but le sigh I did not (it would take me another month to figure out he was not the one for me.) I've chalked it up to a learning experience, and now only date guys who have a personal style, and are aware sweatpants are for the gym, not the travel agents.

Okay, so now to the fun part! My top ten things every man needs to have in his summer wardrobe!
 A good pair of jeans
They should be fairly slim, indigo, and have minimal branding.  Go to an actual denim store such as Dutils, and try on different cuts and styles to find the brand that works best for you.  

Once over the age of 25 any sort of faded, ripped band t-shirt should be promptly tossed and replaced with simple white well fitted (not too tight, not too baggy) tee's.  You can even throw in some coloured ones for good measure (only colours that work with you're complexion though.)

No, that sports bag you used in highschool for basketball is not acceptable.  Think heavy cotton in tan or khaki, or soft brown leather bag is another great option.  No one wants to go on a romantic getaway with Mr. Boring black  luggage.

Whether it be in a cotton or a linen it should be perfectly fitted.  Try colours like tan or even a light stripe. throw it on in the evening for a bit of warmth or pair during the day with shorts and a polo shirt. 

Now is the time to invest in a classic shape that will last through the years.  Be reasonable about your faceshape and what suits you.  Those neon fake Raybans they were giving away at that concert last summer...yaa there's a reason they were giving them away.

Okay, 4 shoes every man should own: Black leather loafer, Boat shoes,  Dessert boots, White sneakers.
If I have to spend another summer seeing men in foam flip flops I may barf.  If you absolutely have to wear flipflops...like we are talking life and death situation... buy them in leather, I beg you.

Perfect for a casual summer wardrobe, they should be close fitting, ankle grazing... perhaps even roll them up and show off those great boat shoes you just bought.

I would love to see the factory that makes those long board shorts surfers love and professional swimmer skin tight speedo's burned to the ground.  Today's man should wear swim shorts, The two acceptable ends of the spectrum are brightly patterned shorts, cut loose enough to feel modest and falling about two-thirds of the way to the knee, and neat-fitting boxer shorts... very reminiscent of the 50's.

Okay men, get to work!



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